"Never explain--your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway."

"One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man."

"Death: To stop sinning suddenly."

"In these days, a man who says a thing cannot be done is quite apt to be interrupted by some idiot doing it."

"A legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of the opposite sex solemnly agree to harass and spy on each other... until death do them join."

"Life in abundance comes only through great love."

"A man builds a fine house; and now he has a master, and a task for life; he is to furnish, watch, show it, and keep it in repair, the rest of his days."

"Do not spit in the well - you may be thirsty by and by."

"Always do what you are afraid to do."

"Who is wise? He that learns from every One. Who is powerful? He that governs his Passions. Who is rich? He that is content. Who is that? Nobody."

"The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug."

"Contempt is the weapon of the weak and a defense against one's own despised and unwanted feelings."